Letters to Moms

To the Mom with her baby asleep in the grocery cart:
How do you do that? I have never, ever been successful at getting my children to sleep anywhere except in their cribs or in the car. Once they pass a few months old, all of my errands must revolve around nap. As soon as they wake up, it is a mad dash to get out of the house and back before the next nap time. Not to say I don't usually push the limits.



To the Mom who brought your snotty nose child to my classroom:
I am sorry. I was really mad at you because I didn't have children yet and I didn't really realize that sometimes you just have to take a child with a runny nose somewhere. Or else you would never go anywhere.



To the Mom who brought your child that recently vomited to my classroom:
I am still mad at you. I don't do throw up and it is not okay to expose me to the stomach virus. It's 24 hours with no symptoms (or more if you can help it)



To the Mom whose newborn sleeps through the night:
I am jealous of you. But I realize that it has nothing to do with how great of a parent you are. You are lucky. Maybe I will be lucky next time.



To the Mom who gained the recommended 25-35 pounds during pregnancy:
You must not like cheeseburgers as much as I do. I will try harder next time.



To the Mom who works out on a regular basis:
I guess you will just have to be skinnier than me because I really can't seem to find time to workout. It is not an excuse. I have no idea how you fit that into your schedule except on a random, once every couple of weeks, basis.



To the Mom who gets up and showers before her children are awake:
I could do this too. I choose sleep instead.


To the Mom who doesn't put their faith in Jesus:
You are really missing out on the ultimate support. Being a mother revolves around prayer. Prayer for your children and for your family. Today I even prayed for a nap.



To the Mom who feeds her children only Organic, non-processed foods:
Although I am embarrassed to admit it to your face, I feed my kids lots of non-organic, processed foods. They are easier and usually cheaper. I do believe in feeding good things to my family and I will try to do better in this area. But I'm still going to McDonalds


To the Mom of only one child:
Enjoy your time with one child. I know it is really difficult. Having your first child turns your world upside down. Just wait until the next one. It gets even harder.


To the Mom of 3 or more children:
You are probably laughing at me right now. You are probably thinking, "Just wait until you have 3 kids. Then it really gets hard." I am sure you are right, and I will plan to eat my words as soon as my next child is born.


To the Mom of twins or triplets:
You are my hero. I am not sure how you do it. You, by far, have the hardest job in the world. I used to think it would be fun to have twins. Now, I am pretty sure I would cry if I found out I was pregnant with multiples.


To all my Mommy friends:
Thanks for being my friends and being imperfect along with me. It feels good to know I am not alone. I love you all so much and each of you makes my life richer. It is so much better to leave the house a mess and go do something fun with you and your kids. We will never get these years back and I plan on making the best of them.


To all my future Mommy friends:
Although it may appear this way from the outside, being a mommy does not ruin your life. In fact, nothing could make it more worthwhile. I wish the joys of mommyhood for all of you.


To my Mom:
Thank you so much for everything you ever did for me. I especially think of all the times I kept you up at night with my tummy issues. You never let me know how much you probably wanted to be asleep. Thanks for letting me think I was the most important thing in the world. I hope I can make my children feel the same way - even in the middle of the night. I love you.

ME